Deciding To Downsize and Move - If You and Your Spouse Disagree

Barbara Z. Perman, PhD

If you and your partner disagree about whether moving is a good idea, you may be able to agree to take some steps that will be beneficial whether you wind up moving or not.  You can take these steps and you will find the process to be much simpler.

1. Start home sale preparation. Assess what needs to be done in the house to prepare it for sale. Start removing clutter and downsizing. Get rid of things both of you agree you don't need anymore.

2. Get needs out on the table. Instead of starting with solutions, "I want to live in Florida...I want to stay here", say, "I'm concerned about slipping on the ice, or "I miss the sunshine". These can lead you to more options.

3. Do research. Get the facts about your options. Make visits to local retirement communities. Visit condos, apartments and other living spaces. Think about spending time in another location for a month or more. Ask someone you know who has internet access to explore options with you on-line.

4. Create a mission statement. The values-based statement will help clarify the purpose and values you have at this stage of your life. If you and your partner each create a mission statement, you have a basis upon which to communicate what is important to you now.

Completing these tasks can assist you the way a lantern does when you are walking in the dark. Even if the destination is unclear, they will give you the light you need to take the next step.