A Father's Day Gift

Barbara Z Perman, PhD

With our busy lives it's easy to take for granted that you and your Dad will get together soon, but days become filled with schedules, work and obligations with little time leftover.  You may be starting to worry about Dad more, concerned that he doesn't seem to go out with his friends much anymore, rarely putters around the house and makes excuses about his forgetfulness. You begin to sense that Dad's health may be failing.

Although you've wanted to start a conversation with him about the possibility of moving, it is difficult to bring up the subject during visits with the grandkids or when just stopping by.  How do you tell Dad how much he means to you and share your concerns?

Remember when you were very young and had no money for presents?  Dad often got a homemade card with a gift certificate for hugs or maybe a coupon for lawn mowing. Maybe this year Dad would appreciate the gift of time spent together-maybe by attending a local baseball game, an afternoon fishing in his favorite spot with a picnic lunch, or taking a walk together in the local park.

Spending a relaxing time together can provide an opportunity to start a conversation about things that may be on your mind. Choosing a neutral spot can make it easier to share your concerns and have them heard. The next step may be to over to tackle a task together, like cleaning out the attic or making some small repairs.  Working together may help to make the job easier, and will keep a valuable connections open.